network: @XXXtra_TerrestriEL

[itselbitch]

WHO: eliot waugh, king of shit, and whoever responds.
WHAT: network texting: he's running low on drugs so now he's hunting for booze.
WHERE: all over because he's also looking while texting.
WHEN: sent out before the event, but take your time to reply. it's not like it's going anywhere in your message history unless you delete it (and then find out you can't delete it). he's not going to not want booze two months from now.
NOTES: probably contains cursing, sexual references, and mentions of drugs and alcohol. eliot is not a role model. don't look inside if you're looking for one.


anyone found any liquor yet

willing to exchange favors

Comments

@n1CxC4Ge

[calculo]

( these usernames make it impossible to figure out who's sending out these messages but robbie has an inkling of who this might be. just a small hunch. )

favors like getting me out of here?

[itselbitch]

[ wait what the hell, nic cage is here? oh. no. no that would be logical. and nothing here is logical. eliot's own username is some dumb shit too. damn. would have been cool to meet nic cage though. ]

sure, if i can figure that out

blowjobs work too
assuming you have the necessary parts required for that transaction

you can close your eyes i won't judge

[calculo]

that's not gonna happen.

( how long would it take whoever this was to figure out who he was? robbie was gonna treat it as kind of game. )

can't believe you're even thinking of that right now.

( no judgment but he's judging you, eliot. )

[itselbitch]

because you don't have a penis or because you don't want a bj
i happen to be VERY good at giving head
for the record

and thinking of what sex or alcohol?
because either would be a welcome distraction from how much pain i'm in right now

[snikthatch]

found a beer

[ A minute or so later: ]

its mine though

[itselbitch]

[ what! he'll take a beer if that's all there is around, hell, eliot would-- oh. goddamnit. ]

they say sharing is caring

help an injured man out??

[snikthatch]

injured how

@xxDARK_STARxx

[omniavincit]

Have some self-respect.

[itselbitch]

never had it before
and i'm pretty sure i'm incapable of finding any at this point

thank you for the concern though

even if you're probably judging me anyway like a giant asshole

but i forgive you

[omniavincit]

Don't text me in 2 weeks looking for penicillin.

@xXxSALTLICKERxXx

[fumitory]

( there is always one, isn't there. )

Is this a joke?

Well - regardless - no. But I appreciate the revival of the bartering system. ( down with capitalism. )

[itselbitch]

i wish

actually it'd be better if it was a dream so i could wake up and not be stuck in a fucked up place full of shadow things trying to murder me and then i can drink and get more oxy and not have to think about how much i miss thinking about alcohol and drugs for recreational reasons only and not for everything hurts like a bitch and i feel sick to death reasons

that said, willing to accept pain pills and disinfectant in place of alcohol

does your phone need charging? need something cooked? need to get laid?

i'm dying throw me a goddamn bone
please

[fumitory]

( jesus wept, Ben's brick phone is about to go flying down a very, very long staircase if these messages don't ease up, is this person going a word at a time?

nope, and to top it off, it is a lot more words than Ben thought could be assembled, in the span of time that his phone rapid-fires with fanfare. )

All right there, give your thumbs a moment. ( this is a lot for Ben to find dumped into his lap all out of left field, but all right. typically, this sort of attitude would illicit a lot of end-of-the-rope lecturing.

at this moment...they're all thoroughly dicked. all of them. Ben's tired, cold, and he doesn't even have the energy to list off clinical knowledge about substance withdrawals. that just leaves him at his absolute baseline...uninspiringly pragmatic. )

My best recommendation is, drink as much water as possible while your body adjusts to the lack, and if I run across any more packets of instant coffee, I can offer you that. The water here could be filthy or riddled with odd things so I wouldnt go face down in a stagnant pool out in the labyrinth.

I have one aspirin, two bottles of sealed water and - admittedly I ran across a diet soda. Dont ask how - its weird. Thats todays specials.

[rehumanize]

Is it that hard to find?

[itselbitch]

considering how long i've looked for it and come up empty

apparently so

[rehumanize]

[G r e a t.]

How long would you say you've looked?

@XXSK3LLYXX

[ragnarsson]

No alcohol. Only water. However, if you find any ale, don't keep it to yourself.

[He could use a tankard full right about now.]

[itselbitch]

assuming there's enough to go around sure
sharing is caring

it's always more fun when everyone's a little drunk

[ragnarsson]

See, I'm glad there's someone else here who gets it.

@MeTaLxHeAd79

[skaa]

what kind of favors?

[itselbitch]

clean water cooked food charged phone
clean clothes if you've got something really damn good and don't mind being naked while i clean them

and maybe some less polite things if that's what wets your whistle

[skaa]

( she's good.... )

what counts as "really damn good"?

i found some ale. ( she likes ale but... ) but i don't think that counts.

also i'm just looking for an exchange of skills. the... less polite things you can keep.

@4tlas_shrugg3d

[badassassin]

Not if you're planning on drinking it.

[itselbitch]

what's the point of liquor if you don't drink it???

[badassassin]

We're in a survival situation. It's better off being earmarked for a poor man's disinfectant than for pleasure.